Stronger Than I Was

This post is about all the shit life throws at you and coming out stronger than before… This one is more of a venting session. For that, I apologize.


People will try to break you any way they know how. They will take everything you have to give and destroy it, leaving you lost and empty. These people don’t deserve your greatness. You deserve happiness. I know sometimes it feels like your whole world is falling apart but it isn’t. It’s okay to be angry. It’s okay to hurt and feel broken. Just know, you aren’t broken. You are better than that!!!!

The key to surviving these people is to come out stronger than you were. Better than you were. Channel that pain, that anger into something healthy.

I have recently found out that the man I fell for wasn’t the man I thought he was. I’m not here to bash him- no one deserves that. But what was done cut to my very core. I have never felt so many different emotions in such a short period of time before. But today, I was sick of it. I was sick of feeling down and angry and devastated. So, I hit the bag. I put my gloves on, walked outside and with a little help of Eminem blaring through my headphones, I hit that punching bag. I cried, I rapped, I punched and with each tear that fell and each knuckle that got torn, I felt the weight fall off. I felt my freedom coming back.

Some people use medicine. Some turn to alcohol. Some turn to others. But, for me, there is nothing like the feeling of my fists hitting that heavy bag. It’s therapy. It’s real. There’s a peacefulness I find in that bag. A sense of freedom. Nothing else matters when I’m there. It’s like setting fire to yesterday.

Take that hurt that you have and convert it to gasoline- set your past on fire. Let it all go. Focus on today, and building yourself to become better, stronger than you were. Forgive. Forgive it all, for yourself. You deserve happiness and you should strive to get it.

Don’t let anyone take that away from you. Pain is beautiful. It means you’re alive, which means you will survive. Feed from it. Find the light…

I’m back. 🙂


Falling off the bandwagon

We all fall off from time to time…

The trick is to not let that define you. The truth is, whether it’s a few weeks, a few months or even a year, you did it once therefore you can do it again.

We all hit a stand still in our journey and the reality of it is that it can be harder to crawl out of that hole than it was to start initially. But we can never let that define who we are. You have to dig deep and find that motivation whether it be through the haters, through song or through your very own soul. You are a warrior and you will always be a warrior.

This is a short post but as I’m sure you all know, I have fallen  off the bandwagon. I have let life, yet again, consume me and have forgotten my real goals. I have forgotten what really matters to me. And that’s ME.


Trust me, I am holding myself accountable for my actions and my downfalls. I am back and going to be better than ever.

It’s a wee bit chili out… Turkey Chili, that is.

As promised, I will be giving out my delicious turkey chili recipe in this post. I don’t mean to toot my own horn or anything but damn, toot toot. This is my best recipe yet. My papa and boyfriend can both attest to that. I would love feedback from anyone who tries this one but I am confident in it enough to promise that it will not let you down! What better way to stay warm in this weather than a nice hot bowl of some healthy, high protein chili!!!!!


1 lb 99% lean ground turkey

1 can of black beans, drained

1 can of red beans

2 tablespoons fresh garlic

1 tablespoon fresh basil

1 green pepper, chopped

2-3 tomatoes, chopped

3 tablespoons chili powder

1 tablespoon garlic powder

1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

1 large can low sodium tomato sauce

1 onion, chopped

dash of cayenne pepper

hot sauce to taste


First, I put the olive oil in the pan and saute the green pepper, onion and garlic until the onion becomes translucent. Then, I add the turkey and cook until browned. After the turkey is fully cooked I add the additional ingredients in and cook on low heat for roughly an hour, stirring occasionally. I like my chili spicy so I add quite a bit of hot sauce and cayenne pepper. But for those of you who don’t like the heat (don’t worry, you can stay in the kitchen) you don’t need to add either.

After the chili is done I highly recommend grabbing a nice big bowl and curling up on the couch with a good book. There is no better way to enjoy this! It’s not only good for the body, but good for the soul as well. C’mon we all deserve a nice break once in a while!


With love,


Excuses Don’t Work in the Game of Life

Hey! Sorry it’s been a while since my last post. I’ve been struggling with motivation this past week. There should be no excuse, I know. Which leads me to what this post is all about- EXCUSES!

“Excuses are for people who don’t want it bad enough”

This is something I truly believe in. We are all guilty of making excuses in all areas of our lives. This should be unacceptable. Each of us needs to start holding ourselves accountable for everything we do. If deep down you want something bad enough, you will find a way to make it happen. End of story, right? I have heard every excuse in the book when people come to me for fitness and health advice. But, the most common is how it’s so hard to fit time in for working out with work, school, and/or kids. And to be frank, I don’t accept that. I know it can be hard but there is always time. People make time for anything that is a priority in life. To use one of my brothers as an example- for years he was working a full-time job and a part-time job on top of that. He was also in school and playing hockey. Needless to say, he was one busy son of a bish. But he was still hitting the gym 6 days a week and meal prepping on top of that. He knew what he wanted and he found a way to incorporate that into his lifestyle. He made it work the best way that he knew how. Again, we are all guilty of this. Me probably more than anyone! But we all need to take a step back and look at our priorities. Make a list if you have to. Your health will be the common denominator in everything on this list. You have kids- good you need to be healthy to ensure you’ll be there for them! You have a job- good you need to be healthy to keep that job! You need to be healthy to accomplish everything in your life! Your well-being should always be your number one priority!!!!!

Here are a few tips to help beat most of our excuses:

  • Schedule reminders in your phone to go to the gym. Putting them into your calendar so it sends you an e-mail or a text will help hold you accountable to get your but in gear! Skipping a scheduled workout will make you feel guilty!
  • Always- ALWAYS keep a bag of gym clothes and shoes in your car at all times. This way you don’t have to go home after work. Or you can always go unexpectedly. Maybe the mood strikes on your way home from a friends. BOOM now you have everything you need right there with you!
  • Keep your gym shoes near your front door- or anywhere you will see them throughout the day. This will also help as little reminders.
  • Put random post-it notes around your house reminding you to go! Trust me on this, it actually works!
  • Meal prep! Cook your meals ahead of time so you don’t have to stress about what to eat or about having time to cook before or after the gym. All you’ll have to do is heat it up! Having your food already planned out will help you avoid eating out!
  • Buy some cheap workout DVDs. You can get them anywhere. Use these on days you simply don’t want to leave the house! Truth be told- I have Tae Bo and I would be lying if I said I didn’t use it once a week. I also have a yoga DVD that I use once a week as well! Go ahead and judge me- it helps!!!!!

The key to health, fitness and all success in general is consistency and DETERMINATION. Again, if you want it bad enough you WILL find a way to get it done!!!!!!

With love,


Shedding Dead Weight

“The closer you get to excellence in your life, the more friends you’ll lose. People love you when you’re average because it makes them comfortable. But when you pursue greatness it makes people uncomfortable. Be prepared to lose some people on your journey.” –Tony A. Gaskins Jr.

So, I first saw this quote a year ago when I began my journey and I did not believe it to be true. I remember thinking to myself, “this is bullshit”. Pardon my french but that is exactly what I was thinking. Who would disappear when you are bettering yourself, ya know? This guy, Tony Gaskins Jr., is supposed to be some type of life coach, right? Okay, so how could he be so ridiculously far off on this? The whole idea of people, “friends” of yours, disappearing when you are bettering your life just completely baffled me. Truth be told, it still does. But, throughout these past 12 months, I’ve learned more and more that he was spot on. I have these people whom I have called “friends” for so, so long, and now that I’m a healthier, happier version of who I have always been, they are either no where to be found or just straight up don’t support me and my journey. Which hurt for a while. At least, until I realized that even though I lost those “friends”, this entire journey has brought so many new, supporting people my way. People who not only support me, but encourage me to be the best possible version of myself in fitness and in every day life. People who genuinely want the best for me no matter what that may mean for them. People who have been, or are currently making the same changes I am. This has also brought me entirely close to my family in ways I never dreamed to be possible. These people are the ones who deserve to be a part of your journey, a part of your life. These are the people who you don’t need to prove yourself to, they already see you at your best, even when you’re at your worst. These are the ones worthy of your love, worthy of your journey.

“Surround yourself with those on the same journey as you,” is another quote I have come across throughout my journey. Unfortunately, I do not know who originated this one, but nonetheless, I stand by this one as well. These people know how you are feeling, they are there to support you and guide you when you need a helping hand. They are, by far, the most understanding people you will come across and that is a promise I can confidently make to you. These are the people I appreciate more than they will ever even comprehend. Thank you endlessly to those of you in my life that have either joined my journey or have stuck around to support this quite drastic change in my life. You will forever hold a special place in my heart. Each and every one of you.

Always remember that “haters gon’ hate and ainters gon’ ain’t.” That one is from the movie The Interview. 🙂 Regardless of the source, it is still equally true.

Tony A. Gaskins, Jr., my hat’s off to you. My sincerest apologies for doubting you.

So don’t stress when people disappear on your journey. You’re just shedding dead weight in more ways than one from here on out.

With love,


Turkey Burger with Sweet Potato Fries. YUMMMMM

With it being winter, all I can think about is come spring and summer. Shorts, sangria, bonfires, and my favorite, GRILLING. So, seeing as all I can think about is a nice, perfectly grilled BBQ burger, I figured I would give away my first perfected recipe. It’s simple and traditional but it will always be a classic. This was the first thing to show me that eating healthy can taste delicious as long as you’re making the right food! 🙂

BBQ’d Turkey Burger:


1 Pound lean ground turkey (I usually use 99% lean. This makes about 4 burgers)

1 1/2 tablespoons of chopped garlic

1 chopped white onion

2 tablespoons of basil

1 tablespoon of red pepper flakes (optional)

1 tablespoon of low sodium seasoned salt

Low fat BBQ sauce (I’m partial to Sweet Baby Ray’s)

Bib lettuce

Directions: (this is as simple as it gets!)

Mix the garlic, onion, basil, seasoned salt and red pepper flakes (if you want a little kick) all into the pound of meat. Don’t be afraid to get your hands dirty- mix it in good! Then roll the meat into four separate patties (about 1/4th a pound each- feel free to make them bigger if you’d like! I promise it won’t hurt!) I then cook these until they are ALMOST to my liking, this is where that delicious BBQ sauce comes into play. I then rub my low sodium Sweet Baby Ray’s on both sides of the patties. Then I proceed to cook them for roughly 2-3 more minutes per side. Doing this will add a very robust BBQ flavor, soooo good.

When the burgers are ready, take them off the grill. Now, you can dress these how ever you would like. To me, there is nothing better than ranch and BBQ sauce mixed together. The combination is undeniably good, even the flavor gods would have to agree. Yes, yes I know ranch is not healthy. However, Greek yogurt ranch is! (I will put this recipe after the fries)! Now, take that bib lettuce and wrap it around your burger (two pieces may be needed but this is ok! It is just lettuce!!!!)

I promise, you won’t even notice these aren’t red meat!

Cajun Sweet Potato Fries:


Sweet Potatoes (as many as you’d like)

Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Cajun Seasoning


Pre-heat the oven to 400 degrees. Then cut the potatoes into fry format. Lay them across your pan and drizzle some extra virgin olive oil over them. Proceed to sprinkle some Cajun seasoning over them. Bake for about 25-30 minutes- or until perfectly crisp.

I’m not a huge fan of normal sweet potatoes. I have discovered that by adding a little spice to them, you can completely tweak their flavor!!!!

Greek Yogurt Ranch:


PLAIN Greek Yogurt (I use Chobani)

Ranch seasoning packet (I use Hidden Valley)


Mix the packet of seasoning in the Greek Yogurt. BOOM! DONE!

The ranch seriously goes good with anything. Veggies, burgers, chicken, potatoes, even tacos.

Ok guys, I’m at the library writing this for you and my stomach is literally grumbling after thinking about these burgers so much. I am starting to get weird looks from people. Please give me your feedback on these recipes! I would absolutely LOVE to know what you think of them!!!!!!!!!

With love,


A Very Special Thanks

I just wanted to start out this whole process by thanking everyone who has been in my life, whether good or bad, over the past 24 years. Each one of you have played your own special part in reaching this milestone in my life, and for that, I sincerely thank you. This journey has been insanely emotional to say the least, especially the past 24 hours. Seeing all this love from you all, whether spoken or not, has truly touched my heart. I appreciate every bit of kindness you all have showed and I just wanted to formally thank you guys. Without the support of my family, my wonderful boyfriend, and my peers, this would have been a battle I’m not sure I would have won. So , thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

Now, not everyone on my journey have been as kind. Nonetheless, I thank them too. I thank them for giving me the strength to do this. For helping me find the motivation I needed to fight for my life, for my happiness. Merely a year ago, I was not only unhappy, I was angry beyond belief. At anyone and anything. With the help of my brother, Danny, and my TERRIFIC father who I refer to as “Papa”, I channeled my anger into therapy. Papa and I would just walk and vent. WALK not run, not jog. WALK. Remember, I was 250 pounds? Yeah, well walking was all I could do. We walked and walked and walked while we both just ranted about life’s struggles, both big and small. We were going a solid 4-5 days a week. At first, I didn’t notice any weight coming off but I did notice that I was “venting” about smaller issues in my life. With each passing week, I was less angry. Next thing I knew, the weight started to come off. One pound at a time. Daddy-daughter therapy (this is what we referred to it as) was working for my body, as well as my mind.

I picked up Tony Horton’s book The Big Picture in March. To be honest, it was supposed to be a birthday gift for Papa, but I may have read it before he had the chance, oops. This book is still something I read when my motivation starts to slip. It explained more, in detail, why eating clean is important. How certain foods, and the chemicals within those foods, affect the body and brain. Naturally, I gave it a try, right? Right! It actually worked. I had more energy, my mind was clean and clear, and most importantly I felt satisfied. Now don’t get me wrong, I didn’t have any good recipes for lean ground turkey or even good veggies so I wasn’t favoring the taste of eating clean. But, I have definitely perfected some amazing recipes along this journey and I will share them on this blog at some point. I promise! That book also taught me the importance of loving myself, on the inside. This to me was the hardest step to date. But between daddy-daughter therapy and watching what I put into my body I was really starting to feel good about myself. As I said in my earlier post, I am still slightly under 150 pounds so I am definitely not where I want to be yet, but I have completely fallen in love with myself and my own journey.

The closer I get to my physical goals, the more I hear people comment on my appearance. “You lost a whole person”, “You don’t even look like you anymore” “You look great. You’re almost there” or my favorite yet “So are you just going to stop when you hit your goals?” First off, hell no. I hit my goals a long time ago and I didn’t stop. My ultimate goal was to just be happy with myself. To finally be comfortable with myself. I hit that goal sometime around June and July. Yes I have physical goals as well. But even those aren’t a number on the scale or a size of the jeans in my dresser. And if I’m being truthful, my physical goals are always going to change. I’ve moved on to muscle building now, just last week actually. So the number on the scale may not go down anymore, and I am more than happy with that! I want to be strong and healthy. Who really gives a crap about the numbers at the end of the day? As long as you’re happy with yourself and take care of yourself, what else truly matters?

Even small steps count. You just have to start your journey the best you can. Believe in yourself and you’ll be amazed with what you can truly overcome.

With love,